Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Grumblings of a Backbencher..!

It was one of those usual nights, and I was just back from my group meeting. The clock showed 2:45 am. I grabbed a cup of tea from LV’s room. The climate was inviting enough for a walk. Falling for the temptation, I pulled my Jerkin and moved over... all alone. Submitting the term paper and getting prepared for the presentations were the least of my worries. I never really mind and it does not really matter. My pondering was over the week’s timetable which read 4 QT sessions. I wanted to scream hard.. For Heavens sake!.. Show me some mercy..! Half my hatred stems from my aversion for the subject and the rest half for the moron [Mr.P] who teaches it. Its already 3 am.. and am off to sleep.

After repeated snoozings, my mobile reads 8:42 am. Why does it have to dawn so early! :( Grabbing a bite, I reach the class @ 09:03 am. P gives u that sickening look... Late Again!.. I was cool with it. Knew anyway that EA who sits besides me wudn’t have come. She runs in @ 09:05 am weaing that “Sorry! Won’t be late anymore” look. That it would take an eternity for her to be on time is another chapter altogether :)

The class gets underway. People check out their 2 important belongings. A pen drive with their presentations and the text book. My definitions of essentials for the class is diametrically distinct. One.. My fastrack watch. Yup! Watching the second’s hand tick is my favourite pastime. And two.. My cellphone. To crosscheck if my watch is showing the right time.Of course, therez the wall clock to add spice to my interests. But when the class gets underway, my prized possessions- the time pieces drool along like a man parched for water in Sub Saharan Africa.

Listening to the class makes me sleepy. So I let my thoughts wander. I suddenly remember my friend UM talking about how he fathoms looking at a “Cutie” during QT.:).. I gauge his musings. And suddenly I turn around. I find people putting up their hands. Some of my batchmates are also among the lot. This is not very uncommon considering the fact that people aim to gain attention to score brownie points. And suddenly Mr.P asks one of my batchmates to come forward. And then.. all my batchmates stand up. I take a little time to realize wats going on. I get a sense of the impending disaster. Then I give that infuriated look. “What!.. U people put up ur hands so that our group could go there and present!..” Please don’t do this to me. Bachche ki jaan mat lo yaar..:(

But the damage was already done. I walk up to the stage. Therez a mini conference within our group. I put my foot forward and say “ Am doing the case summary. U guys take care of the analysis.” They say IIMS is a great leveller. VN and AMR pat my back and say.. Stay off limits dude. We’re doing the summary.! A mini volcano erupts and we finally decide that myself, VN and AMR will keep mum and the rest three would do the presentation!. Talk of a bargain!.That’s a windfall for me! Coup of sorts really.

The presentation gets over and am back to my seat. As usual lost in thoughts. Wherez life leading me? How on earth am I going to clear this paper? I turn to my left. I find KS caricaturing. But I know hez a whiz kid. He’d find his way through this mess. Then I look right. I find EA immersed with something. I find her doing some painting. Gives me some hope. Even shez not listening to the class. Then I turn backwards. I find “The Dude K” stealing the words from my mouth.”Hey Dude.. Why do u even bother to look at me. I’m the captain of ur sinking ship”. Machan.. Ni en uyir Nanban da. Talk of Hope!. I’d trust u more than Ben Bernanke whoz supposed to pull America out of recession. We’l definitely form the bottom 2.

All of a sudden, my fastrack shows 10:12 am. I begin the countdown. 3 mins to go. 180.. 179..178................... 3..2..1. Just as I thought the ordeal was over and eagerly await the break, a hand goes up in the air and one of our esteemed participants do a DP*. “Sir!. How can u say that the non parametric test is wrong!”. I was exasperated. “WTF!”. Does it even matter if something called a Non Parametric test existed? Don’t get on my nerves man!. For heaven’s sake somebody tell him the time is 10:15!. I’d gone bonkers by this time. Now.. A flurry of hands go up. More DP’s follow. How I wished I could be convicted for the umpteen number of murders I wanted to commit at that instant! The ignominy of being made to sit through the break makes me mad!. I sit back and realize. Zindagi mein number kamane ke do tareekey hote hain.
Ek DP.. Doosra ACDP*!!.. :)
End of story!..
*DP : Means desparate participation for my Non IIM frnz.
*ACDP is a trademark variant of the same.